When Eggs Sue

When eggs sue,
there's not much you can do.
Although we prefer them in a stew,
they have their rights, too.

"We don't mind ending up poached,
in a salad or dying hard.
Fried is not an issue--your honor,
even if it's with butter or lard.

It's the whipping we decry,
baking us in bread; wheat or rye.
Eggs in a cake we say,
are not whole in any which way.

A sunny-side-up speaks of joy.
An omelette has a foreign gist.
But eggs with rice, chicken or soy,
are just ingredients on a list.

Our integrity is destroyed, your honor,
when we are put up to speed.
Yellow blending with white: Oh, the horror!
just to serve a different kind of treat.

At least Ovaltine gives us credit,
even if the chocolate is the hook.
Children everywhere have said it,
eggs are the best food in their book.

What we demand with this lawsuit,
is a compensation of sorts:
a bigger E in the alphabet soup,
and a library full of egg reports."

So I tell you my friend,
as I tell the common folk.
When eggs sue, they never reach an end,
because deep inside, they're just a yolk.